5 April Fools Stories You Wish Were True.

Trying to find a little sunshine during Week 2 of the lockdown.

Regardless of whether the old pussy-grabber-in-chief finally has a crisis of conscience, finally commits a crime that will not be ignored by the Republicans, or simply desires to pursue a life of peace, the exit of Agent Orange would be welcomed around the world.

Los Angeles, California (AP) — In response to widespread reports of retail price gouging across the nation, large groups of people are now forming lines in front of the offending markets armed not with protest signs but with products for sale at cost.

Individual hoarders and Craigslist profiteers have decided that enough is enough and are now greeting desperate shoppers with a hearty “hello neighbor!” and what are thought to be wide smiles behind their surgical masks as they offer toilet paper, paper towels, bottled water, hand sanitizer, plastic gloves, and surgical masks at the price they originally paid for these goods.

“This is so wrong at a time of crisis,” said Harold Hoarder, “we must remember we are a community.”

“We’re all in this together,” added Jerry “The Shark” Calabrese. “With gambling and the prostitute biz drying up, I thought I’d try my hand at price gouging. I just couldn’t stomach this kind of shady behavior.”

Now you know why so many human writers are locked in Curgatory™.

But discrimination occurs within the bot universe, too.

In this story, a group of feminist writers protest the current state of AI, pointing out that Siri and Cortana were simply gophers, while the Medium author bots are getting book deals.

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Ad agency creative director, writer & designer at https://guttmanshapiro.com. Former pro tennis player and peak performance coach for professional athletes.

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