As always, I found another meaning for coffee (as in going out for) after I had posted my response. It’s apparently specific to Los Angeles, and the reason I must have failed so many times at dating before meeting someone outside of California.

As far as your trace amounts of Jewish DNA, my rule of thumb is, if you don’t have enough of it in you to get thrown in a concentration camp, why would anyone bother? It’s not like you’re appropriating anything that’s remotely cool from a cultural perspective.