Leroy Jenkins!!!!! That is the funniest video ever.

It’s funny how different people react to different elements of GRRM’s writing. I started with the show, but after season 6 ended, decided to try reading the books. I started with the Duncan and Egg short stories and loved them.

Then I decided to invest some real time and read “A Dance With Dragons.” I loved that, too, as there were a few plot twists and lots of Tyrion. Then I read “Game of Thrones” and loved that, but initially skipped the Sansa and Catelyn chapters because they are the most idiotic characters in the books. Then I read their chapters and it wasn’t so bad, because I learned a lot of interesting details.

But here’s the thing, the foundation of the books is built on quicksand. We forget or excuse the author because he wrote book one over twenty years ago, so no one (probably including him) could have possibly forseen all the twists and turns and the thousands of details that could produce inconsistencies.

I wrote this before, but the fundamental insanity of ASOIAF is that Ned Stark breaks his most sacred oath (the one to his sister) by allowing Jon Snow to take the Black. Not only does this mean Jon renounces all rights as a nobleman (wife, children and THE IRON THRONE), but he’s going to one of the most dangerous places on earth, where he is almost sure to die because of (choose one: cold, Wildlings, White Walkers, Alistair Thorne).

Even worse, his wife is the most irrational and hypocritical character in the Game of Thrones universe who is considered a “hero.”

Here are some of Catelyn’s most notable achievements:

  1. Holds a nasty grudge against her husband for the entirety of Jon Snow’s life without ever questioning Ned’s motives for bringing back the baby. In the real world, people either forgive and forget or get divorced. Those that stay in a relationship and poison it every day are not only cruel, but masochists.
  2. Gives no reason for Ned to trust the closest person in his life with the secret of Jon Snow’s birth. People in good marriages have a level of trust where they can share the burden of a huge secret. In addition, most people who are in a long term relationship start to understand the slightest signals that show any kind of emotional pain or discomfort in their partners. Many women are adept at knowing when their husband is lying or cheating. Catelyn’s rage and desire to get revenge against Ned and his bastard son blinds her from seeing the signs.
  3. Cruelly sets up Jon before he leaves for the Wall so she can hiss that she wishes he was the one who fell from the tower instead of Bran.
  4. Believes in the weakest circumstantial evidence that Tyrion tried to kill Bran.
  5. Tries to hide, freaks out, then completely changes her mind to give a rousing speech so Tully bannerman arrest Tyrion.
  6. Refuses to understand basic ideas about motive (Tyrion has none) and self incrimination (why would anyone use a weapon that would identify him as the man behind the attempted assassination in Bran’s room?)
  7. Refuses to reconsider Tyrion’s guilt after he saves her life in the battle against the bandits on the way to the Vale.
  8. Ignores the obvious consequences her actions will bring, with her husband and daughters now living in a Lannister-controlled city.
  9. Treats Robb like he’s her little boy in front of his men in some meetings.
  10. Releases Jamie in the hopes of recovering her girls, instead of letting Robb handle the hostage negotiations. After executing the elder Karstark for disobeying orders, Robb imprisoning his mother showed his weakness and inconsistency as a ruler. Her betrayal effectively killed any chance for Robb to be a successful leader and win the war.
  11. Fails to expect some type of Frey betrayal at the Red Wedding until it was too late. She grew up knowing the Freys and their family history. She also knew the culture of Westeros and the seriousness of Robb breaking his oath to marry a Frey daughter. If anyone should have been on extreme alert and demanded extra precautions, it should have been her.
  12. Threatens to murder Walder Frey’s young wife, then slits her throat in the most completely useless gesture ever. If she had used the girl to get close enough to Walder to kill him, or escape, I could see the point. But she’s thinking her life is over because she watched her son die (conveniently forgetting her remaining four children), so as her last act on earth, she murders an innocent.
  13. Becomes zombie Lady Stonehenge and goes on a killing spree.

So, as much as we might enjoy the books, there are also plot holes that make ASOIAF a set of wonderful fantasy novels but far short of the air tight story lines we expect from our greatest fiction writers.

Written by

Ad agency creative director, writer & designer at https://guttmanshapiro.com. Former pro tennis player and peak performance coach for professional athletes.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store